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Massively Transformative Habit: Renewing of The Mind
“He who conquers his mind conquers the world.” – Zeno
I’ve quoted that sentence out loud and in my head more times than I can possibly remember. It’s something I strive to be able to do. Of all the things I can manage, my mind is the one I want the most power over.
The fact is, the mind is under constant attack. The Matrix is always vying for a position in the space between our ears—telling us what to want, how to live, who to like, how to act.
The Bible reads in Romans 12:2, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
The process of renewing our mind must be a daily ritual. A practice like taking a shower or putting on clothes. Our mind is constantly gathering bits of information, trying to store them and use them. This data becomes filters by which we see and act upon the world outside our mind.
The only way we can keep our thoughts clear and controlled is to go through a renewal process each and every day. The Stoics were constantly reminding us how little we can actually control in this world. However, they were also quick to remind us we can, in fact, control our mind. This, in turn, determines how we react to those things we cannot control.
The habit of transforming one’s mind daily can become a superpower. The best time to begin the practice is before the needed reaction is present. Let’s discuss.
**Meditation**
Meditation is something that took me years to adopt. First, it was because I just didn’t get it. I didn’t scoff at it, but I thought it was for people who were a little more woo-woo than me. Then one day I was influenced by this Austrian bodybuilder who convinced me to give it a try.
It was around 2005 or so, and I was listening to the Tim Ferriss Show—a place where I’ve gotten some of my best life hacks over the years. Tim was interviewing Arnold Schwarzenegger. First, I was amazed that the relatively new podcaster who was actually known for writing the 4 Hour Workweek had scored such a huge guest—both physically and figuratively.
Arnold started talking about how he had found success in his life as a businessman—first as a real estate investor and then as a bodybuilder and finally a movie star. He discussed how in his first years in LA he began practicing meditation.
He and Tim then went on to riff on the benefits of sitting silently and focusing on your breath. I have to admit, I was completely influenced by a movie star. If Arnold did it, maybe I should, too. So began my meditation practice.
I downloaded an app—I think it was Headspace, and started meditating based on their beginner’s tract.
The thing that struck me at first was how difficult it was. I kept asking myself, “Am I doing this right? Aren’t I supposed to conjure up some out-of-body experience? This can’t be right? Do I really like these underwear? I wonder what year Mr. Griffin, my third-grade science teacher died? This can’t be right.”
My monkey brain is a maniac. Trying to get it to shut up and let me be seemed an impossibility. Then I got permission. Permission for what, you ask? Permission to stop trying. That’s right. The best advice I ever got for meditating was to stop trying to meditate.
I don’t remember who gave me permission, but I’m grateful nonetheless. Here’s what I learned. There is no meditating the right or wrong way. Here’s another thing. There is no magical length of time to meditate. I used to think if I only went for 5 minutes, I hadn’t meditated at all. That’s not true. The fact is there are no rules to meditation. You just do it.
Granted there are some tactics to get the most out of the session, but there is no right or wrong. What I’ve learned to do when all the weird thoughts like my third-grade teacher’s death or why I’m still angry at my brother for something that happened years ago pop up, I just see the thought, let it run its course and continue. I just kind of watch it pass by as though I’m looking out a window of a car.
I’ll count my breaths for a while or try some box breathing. The important thing is to stay. That’s it. Just stay. When thoughts come to mind like literally every other thing your brain thinks you should be doing other than sitting and doing nothing, tell yourself, “No. It can wait. I’m going to stay right here.”
Take a deep breath and continue.
The difficulty of meditation is, in my opinion, an indication of just how bad we need it. I look at it like this. It’s like our laptop. We’re going along surfing the web checking out the latest Jordan Peterson vs. the world debate when all of the sudden the mysterious blowing sound appears. It’s like the noiseless smoke that starts to rise in a movie that ends up blowing up.
The fan on the laptop has been initiated. For the record, I hate the fan. I can’t stand it. I don’t like to hear it, but more importantly, I know what it means. It means my laptop is stressed. I’m asking too much of it. It’s overheating. It needs to chill or meditate. So I shut down all the unused applications and sometimes even close it up and give it a rest altogether.
Our minds are like this. There is a constant barrage of thoughts and concerns going on in the background we don’t see. Sometimes they overload in the form of a migraine or just pure exhaustion. When we take time to pause and breathe, we allow these thoughts to settle. What’s more, we learn to better control the thoughts.
There was once this episode of I Love Lucy. Lucy and Ethel went to work at a chocolate factory. They were supposed to be sorting and packaging the chocolates as they made their way down the line. Eventually, the chocolates started coming at such a fast rate the two of them couldn’t keep up. It was chaos, as was often the case with Lucy.
This is a metaphor for our brain and our thoughts. If Lucy had taken the time to stop the belt, take a breath, and devise a strategy for handling all the chocolates, she would have been much better off. It wouldn’t be nearly as funny, but it would have been more effective.
And by the way, I keep referring to this as meditation. You can call it mindfulness, breathwork, or whatever you want. Yes, there are technical differences between these things, but if you’re just beginning I don’t want you to get caught up in semantics. Call it what you want, just start to do it.
There’s a funny scene in the movie “The Great Outdoors.” Roman Craig played by Dan Akroyd had crashed his brother-in-law Chet Rippley’s (played by John Candy) family vacation to the north woods. Roman is a money-grubbing sleazy Wall Street guy while Chet is a laid-back everyman. In this particular scene, the two of them are sitting on the deck of this lake house overlooking the lake. Behind the lake is a wall of trees.
Roman looks across the lake at the trees and tells Chet what he sees. He lays
out exactly what he would do with all that valuable waterfront property detail by money-making detail. He then concludes with a question for Chet, “Now I ask you. What do you see?”
Chet replied, “I see trees.”
This is what meditation has done for me. Where I once constantly looked at everything with a racing and scheming mind full of worry, ambition, angles, ambition, now I actually see trees, and they are beautiful.
I know that sounds a little silly, but it’s the honest truth. I even described it to a friend this way. I had recently been on a walk and I kid you not for the first time I noticed trees in a way I never had before. I can’t really explain it. It was like looking at the Mona Lisa for the first time. I just looked and noticed how cool a tree is. It was beautiful; it had seen years of storms. It provided shade, food, and shelter for squirrels. It just looked cool. I know it sounds like I was on some kind of trip, but I wasn’t. My brain had just started to slow the world down to a place where the chocolates were less likely to pile up on me.
As part of transforming your mind, take the time to breathe. Stop, and just be. Meditate. There are so many great experts on the topic of meditation. My favorite is Dawson Church. His book “Bliss Brain” is probably my ‘go-to’ book for understanding both the benefits and best practices of meditation. But again, don’t overthink it. Just get started.
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